Thirty days ago I was walking around a festival in St. Michaels, Maryland sipping a beer and enjoying the warm, moist, brackish air of the Chesapeake Bay where I grew up.
A man about my age walked up to me. He was tall, weathered, and obviously on some sort of mission. He approached me with a card in his hand and he was holding it out to me.
Yeah, I had that feeling of, "Jeez dude, really, I'm just walking around here."
In 10 minutes I would clearly understand his mission and feel his undying determination to make meaning from a tragedy.
His 23-year-old daughter, Hanna, had been killed recently in a boating accident.
She was an amazing daughter, sister, friend and human being.
Her boyfriend and she were cruising in their boat when they suddenly slammed into a sandbar in about 17 inches of water. She flew over the bow so fast her boyfriend couldn't stop the boat from running over her and causing the head trauma which became her cause of death.
Why? Why?! Why?!?!
*****
I spent about 20 minutes with Hanna's dad listening to his story. He spoke about the horror and sadness of losing a child. He talked about his journey to make sense of it. He described with passion his determination to make her life have meaning and her story to help others.
I told him how sorry I was for the loss of his daughter and told him how amazing he was as a man and father. It was inspiring to meet someone who suffered such a tragic loss and decided to turn his WHY into something meaningful and useful to others.
I could certainly relate to him. But my "silly little divorce story" seemed to pale in comparison to the pain he must be suffering.
I had no idea this tall man with the serious face was about to change my day. He gave me a shift in perspective I want to share with you today.
In this video I talk briefly about this perspective and how to change your WHY question into a WHAT question.
