ONE Simple Trick to a 51% Improvement in Your Marriage by Bedtime

Published: Sun, 07/25/21

Hey,

Do you ever catch yourself saying stuff like this?

* Our marriage is struggling

* Our marriage is falling apart

* Our marriage is stuck

* Our relationship is going through tough times

* Our marriage isn't in a happy place

* Our marriage isn't sexual

* Our marriage is a sh*t show

If you get my regular emails it means you're a sharp, caring, straight-shootin', thinking man. You appreciate complex ideas made simple. You have a bias for action and like tips you can use seconds after reading them.

I'm going to give you one simple trick to change your thinking about your marriage and feel 51% better by bedtime tonight.

*****

There's a silly habit couples get into.

They talk about their marriage like they're watching a storm together.

They point out all things wrong with the marriage as if it is an entity separate from their own thoughts and behaviors. They blame the poor "marriage" for stinking up the place.

This is convenient. It's keeps both of them from immediately thinking or doing anything differently at this very moment.

The storm is THEM and they can't see it.

* They exaggerate personal offenses

* They react to their frustrations like teenagers

* They constantly search for what's wrong instead of what's right

* They attack with contemptuous thoughts and react defensively

* They feel so victimized they can't imagine saying or doing one kind or loving thing

* And they give up all their power by blaming the "troubled marriage".

So what's the one simple trick?

Stop it. Just. Stop. It.

You and she will NEVER stop it at the same time.

Somebody has to see what's really happening and change the energy.

You must decide it is YOU who will go first for no other reason than you WANT to. You see the simple, logical and empowering truth in this!

You get to choose your mindset, your mood, your perspective, your words and your actions...at all times.

And I promise...

If you do this experiment below starting now, you will have a 51% improvement in your experience of being married tonight.

Why 51%? Simply because YOU decided to go first. You've taken the lead over yourself and, therefore, 51% of the negative energy in your relationship.

Here are your instructions starting now and until you fall asleep tonight.

1. That's you to the right. Period. Don't believe any other thought about yourself but that. There is no storm...you just THOUGHT there was.

2. Look in the mirror now and grin at yourself and crack open a beer or any other drink of choice.

3. Find a child or a dog and lay on the floor with them and have a goofy conversation. Hug them. Tell them you love them.

4. Think of something about your wife you sincerely appreciate, adore and/or respect. Write it down on a Post-It note. Do that two more times. Stick it in your pocket.

5. Think of a time when you were feeling TOTALLY AT EASE...when you felt clear, confident, happy and engaged with life. (this is your default state you've somehow forgotten, brother)

6. Find 3 things that need to get done around the house before bedtime. Do them quietly and without fanfare. Pick things that matter to the family. (Don't try to impress her by rewiring the kitchen)

7. Go to bed. Take 3 deep breaths. Decide that you are waking up in the morning to a beautiful sunrise and a brand new day. Fall asleep with that Post-It note under your pillow.

8. Go back to Step 1.

*****

Tomorrow, I would love for you to send me a personal email if you actually did all 8 steps. I want to know how it felt and how you slept.

I don't care how she reacted to you. I care about what changed inside of YOU.

I want to know if you experienced a 51% shift in your perception of the "stormy marriage".

I want to know if it didn't help you.

I want to know what thoughts, feelings and lingering "Yeah, but you just don't understand!" objections you have.

Lastly, I want to know if you want to have about a 90-minute conversation about it. About YOU. About HER. And about how to string together more good days than bad.

We'll set up a "2x4 of Clarity Coaching Call". No strings.

Either I or one of my amazing coaches will contact you right away if you send in this incredibly personal contact form. (I'm always amazed how much detail guys put in this thing)

That's it. Easy peasy.

*****

If you're a man who has been reading these emails or watching GG2GM videos for awhile, you might be thinking it's time to sh*t or get off the pot.

Is it time for you to get engaged with other men doing this kind of stuff every day?

I want to bring your attention to one of the coolest retreats going on in September. It's in Hurricane, Utah, just north of Las Vegas.

Our coaches Dennis Collins and Matt Epsky are hosting the Grounded Man Golf Retreat and invited me to be a special guest. I can't wait.

And guess what. I SUCK at golf! I don't care and I want you to not care too. This retreat includes so much more than the golf activity.

Take a look at what is planned at this all-inclusive getaway and think about joining us. There a few spots still open. I'd love to have a drink with you in the evening watching a gorgeous sunset and learning more about the life you're creating for yourself.

Lotta love, brother.

Steve

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