Hey,
I put Sydney to sleep last night. It was time.
I mentioned her a little while ago in my letter to you. She is the dog with
the brain tumor and has been slowly getting worse since her Christmas time seizures.
There was no amount of money or heroic efforts that could have saved her. I'll miss her a lot and it's a sad morning around here.
I've always winced at the word "euthanasia".
It's so damn clinical, calculated and seemingly straight forward.
It's not. There are dozens of variables, emotions, options and opinions on when is the "right time to finally let go". I felt paralyzed sometimes thinking about what to do next.
I'm lucky to
have my veterinary technician girlfriend by my side to help me sift through all that. Her experience and empathetic nature has been a huge help to me during this process.
The term "marriage dissolution" is kind of like the word "euthanasia".
It's so sterile. It's what they put at the top of the legal divorce forms.
"Dissolving" doesn't even come close to describing the decision to end your
marriage.
I know that pain too. And the questions...
- What did I do wrong?
- Why did her feelings for me change?
- What can I do differently?
- Why can't she see the changes I'm making are
real?
- How can I save this? Should I save this?
You don't just decide to "dissolve" your marriage, bury it and move on.
It's a LOT more complicated than that.
- What if we were to let THIS marriage die and create a new one?
- Does she even want that with me?
- Have I been the partner I want to be in this marriage?
- Am I willing to change? Is SHE willing to change?
- Do we even share the same values and want the same things for a healthy marriage?
- What will happen to me, the house, the kids, the money...and the dog if I get divorced?
And this is where my experience and empathetic nature comes in.
I help you
see the issues, the causes and your options clearly. I'll lay it all on the line for you in ways that help you feel better about what's happening.
It's not all your fault. It's never all your fault.
But, believe it or not, THIS is actually one of the best times in your life.
This is the time where men GROW or men wither. The emotional trauma of this part of your life has a
PURPOSE.
Don't waste it by mulling around and wondering what's going to happen.
Use this time to learn the life lessons waiting for you. These are the lessons that will help you THRIVE no matter what happens.
- You truly ARE a man of high value who deserves the relationship you desire
- You DO deserve to be happy in a healthy relationship full of respect, trust, affection and passion
- You CAN make changes in yourself that will ensure those things will certainly happen for you
- Your marriage may be the perfect place for you to accomplish this
- Your marriage may have to "dissolve" before you can accomplish this
Where can you learn these lessons?
You have to be willing to dive in. Get deeper than where you are now. Answer some eye-opening questions.
You can make something happen.
Stand by and watch what happens.
Or you can just wonder what happened.
Your choice. Men who make things happen start here.
But don’t click on that if you would rather just wait and see what happens.
