Do you sometimes “fake it” with your woman?
Do you think she can tell?
Yes. She can. And it bugs the hell out of her.
Fake what exactly, you ask? It’s not what you’re thinking.
I’m talking about how she feels your efforts to get attention, show appreciation and express your desire for
her.
If you’re faking it, she will see it immediately and turn off instantly.
How does a guy “fake” those things?
He does it by using “techniques” he’s read about or by doing any number of things designed to gain her approval.
Examples? Okay. These are ones I’ve heard many times from many
guys.
- I do practically all the housework and never get a thank-you.
- I tell her she’s beautiful all the time and she just rolls her eyes!
- I did everything she asked me to do without complaining.
- I always ask her what’s wrong and what I can do differently.
- I’m careful not to do anything I know will piss her
off.
- She likes to be in control so I let her make most of the decisions.
How does she know these things are coming from a guy who is faking it?
Why is she not buying what he is selling?
Because in each example he has a secret. And she knows what it is.
He is trying to “make her happy”.
He is trying to get her to be “nicer” to him.
He is trying to gain enough “points” so she will have sex with
him.
And this bugs the hell out of her. It is unattractive. It actually feels like PRESSURE to her and forces her to move away. She can’t make herself WANT to be close to guy who does those things.
It’s exactly how it feels when you’re on a car lot and you see a salesman approach you. It feels like, “Ugh. Oh no. Here we go.”
I’ll never forget how and why
I bought the first (and only) brand new truck I’ve ever owned. It was a 1988 Ford F-150 pickup with two-tone paint and a 5.0 liter V8. Bed liner included. Damn. Sweet.
The sales guy came walking toward me and stopped about 20 feet away.
“Whew”, I thought. Any closer and I might have run away.
Here’s what he said.
“Hey. I see you’ve found a truck. This baby comes
equipped with 4 wheels, a motor, and a steering wheel. Oh yeah, brakes are included. Seriously, I assume you know what you need to know about it.”
Then he tossed the keys in the air right at me and said, “Take it out for as long as you like. Let me know what you
think.”
Then he walked away.
I called out, “Don’t you want my driver’s license or something?”
He said, “Why? I’ve got your car here.” (A ’76 Toyota – no less)
He didn’t even look back.
I really liked that guy. He didn’t seem to care if he sold a truck or not. And he trusted me.
He made me smile.
I caught those keys. I drove that truck. I took it back home to show the neighbors who oohed and aahed like good neighbors do.
I bought the truck.
And even though, to this day, I KNOW exactly what his “shtick” was, I appreciate his style. I appreciate the way he treated me.
I appreciate him NOT BEING OVERLY INVESTED in my reactions or my ultimate
decision.
He wasn’t faking it. He didn’t care about my reactions or decisions. He sold cars and trucks the way he wanted to. He did it on his terms and didn’t try too hard to impress or please his customers.
He gave me credit for knowing something about trucks and the fact he was in the business of selling them. It was honest. No
games.
I could say no. I could say yes. No problem either way.
He didn’t have to actually DO anything
special.
It was all about how authentic he was BEING. No pressure. No expectations.
He knew he had an awesome truck to
sell. And if I didn’t buy it – somebody would.
Moral of the story?
Shoot me an email with your thoughts or questions. Just hit reply.
If I get just one reply, I’ll share it in the next newsletter and give my thoughts on those thoughts.
With tons of love and
respect,
Steve
