Does this mean everything is your fault? Heck no. It just means that if you want to have any prayer of fixing your relationship you will need to turn your focus to yourself.
The things Dave needs to fix are inside him. It may already be too late for his marriage. But he won't know until he takes
the first step of showing Emily he understands his part and is committed to personal change. Same for Emily.
What if it's too late? I know. It's sad to think about.
Even so, they need to fix these things for their NEXT relationship!
THIS is where a personal
counselor or coach can make a TREMENDOUS difference in your life. Pick someone you know, like, and trust. Pick someone you respect enough to hold you accountable.
It is the very safest place to get REAL about the crap you've been thinking, saying, and doing which has been reflected back into your face. I've personally had to wipe a lot of that crap off my own face. So, I get it.
Choosing to go solo takes courage. Discovering that
you've had the power all along to improve your relationship is scary.
A man or woman needs the "cohones" to say,
"Screw this. I can be and will be a better partner in this relationship. It's the only way I want to live. It's the only way I will ever find out if we
can have the relationship we THOUGHT we would have."
You never know until you try. This is an actual email I got tonight from Dave (not his real name) about his choice to be courageous over the last month.
"During my first phone call with Steve I was in tears at some moments about my relationship and general emotional status. However, on that call I also felt really comforted by the possibilities of working toward being a better
man and getting my woman back.
I just finished my 4th meeting with Steve... I'm not yet fully back with this woman that I love, but I am now calm, confident, and actually looking forward to diffusing any and all potential situations that might arise when I interact with her.
I'm enjoying my life for myself and enjoying the time that I spend with her. Reaching out to Steve and other men is a great step toward being the man you want to be for
yourself and all those surrounding you." Josh - New Orleans
This email came from Emily (not her real name) last month
I was not sure a "man's coach"
could help me overcome some long-standing fear and personal blocks. After talking with Steve initially, it seemed worth a try.
Over three intense sessions of understanding my problem (me), Steve provided resources and role-plays on how to get out of my own way. He gave tools to understand my gifts in a relationship, as well as confidence in making commitments and embracing a loving relationship.
Steve leads by example for giving "your gifts" and commitment to whatever you're doing. He showed up fully at our appointments and packed them full of useful tools, laser-focused feedback and a hardy dose of encouragement to get it right. He is gifted and knowledgeable on relationship challenges - including the feminine side! Deanna - Fort Collins
Grab your "cohones" a shoot me an email. It's time to talk.
