The One Thing You Must Do Before She Can Love You Again

Published: Wed, 07/15/26

Updated: Wed, 07/15/26

Hey brother,

First, I want to invite you to our next group coaching call tomorrow, Thursday 16th July at 12pm mountain time.

The topic for this call is: How to Write Your Future Story (& Why It's Essential That You Have One)

We're going to talk about:

What's the point of having a future story anyway?

Why past stories often just turn into your future story

How to use your future story to avoid making past mistakes

How to use a future story to improve your upcoming weekend or vacation

Why we often let OTHERS write our story and keep us from the one we want

This is going to be a great conversation! If you're looking for a new mindset to keep moving forward, you'll love this Roundtable session!

If this call sounds interesting to you, join our Men's Roundtable Group Coaching Community here.
(You'll also gain access to 7 years of recorded previous group coaching sessions and our private Facebook community).

Now onto today's newsletter...

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There's a "chicken and the egg" situation I want to address right here...right now.

And this is crucial to HOW YOU THINK about getting what you want in life and relationships.

How you think about everything is the only control you have and all you will ever need.

Why?

Because the moment you change the way you think about the things happening in your life...those very things will start changing in front of your eyes.

I'm in the business of helping men CHANGE THEIR PERSPECTIVE about what it means to be a man. I teach them HOW TO THINK differently.

What causes us to become needy, dependent and afraid in relationships?

What is the true source of confidence, clarity and well-being if it's not in the warm, accepting arms of a woman?

I ask men to tell me what they MOST WANT in the next 6 months. What's the most important question they need answered?

Here is the #1 most popular question I get from men.

"How can I get my wife/girlfriend to like me/love me/pay attention to me/give me affection/desire me/touch me/have sex with me again?"

And then I ask them what they see as their biggest barrier to getting what they want.

Here is #2 most popular question I get from men.

"How can I find the confidence/strength/self-esteem/courage to be the man I know I can be?"

You see the problem already, don't you? (my readers are incredibly smart, intuitive people...I know this)

Those two questions need to be flip-flopped.

There is no mystery about which comes first - confidence or attractiveness.

We must FOCUS on the real problem and make it our top priority.

Your sense of confidence/strength/self-esteem/courage precedes every positive thing you want to create.

And, obviously, if you have the OPPOSITE of those things...you will create nothing you want.

I talk about this more in this video.

The One Thing You Must Do Before She Can Love You Again

The fastest way I know to learn to be more confident is with other men doing the same thing

Self-help is a popular route to building your confidence.

Sometimes it's quite effective.

However, you can overdose on self-help when it becomes a search for INFORMATION...TIPS...HACKS...OR TRICKS.

There is NO QUICK FIX to learning true confidence. It takes conscious action and application to real-world situations.

Consistency is key to learning a new habit and creating new patterns in your behavior.

When I wrote my book, Straight Talk Tools for the Desperate Husband, I purposely put in all kinds of examples of situations, dialog, conversations and case studies to help you TAKE ACTION.

I know it's ACTION which will cause the shift you need in your thinking and your confidence. And when this happens, I get an email like this:

"I know this sounds maybe funny to some, but it is just so damn easy living with this sense of calm, knowing that it is just a movie, an exciting, thrilling virtual reality. If you want passion, its yours, if you want love, right there it is, if you want adventure, bang ...you can have it. What is also really exciting is the realization that if you want pain, hate, guilt, sadness, loneliness, those too are simply choices that you can make to acquire those things." (Matt - 2/2024)

Self help CAN BE quite effective when you know how to turn the information into action.

Get the book by going HERE. It's only $7.99.

But, if you can't get it due to circumstances out of your control, reply to this email now and I'll send you a free PDF version of it. It's not about the money for me...I just want you to get a leg up and start taking action.

I know ANOTHER WAY to learn confidence quickly.

It's more than $7.99, but it's an investment (and experience) of a lifetime.

Come and join Dan and I along with some incredibly amazing men who have walked in your shoes – or are walking in them now....

Are you ready to learn this stuff?

Are you ready to ask for a little help?

Are you ready to meet the kind of men who have been missing in your life?

If you want to learn how to feel that swagger of confidence you need to attract your wife again, then let's talk...

Apply for a free coaching call with us - in one 90 minute call, we will help you get clear about what to stop doing that's contributing to the current issues you're facing and what to do instead to improve things starting today.

What You'll Actually Get From a Call With Us

Watch the short video above to understand what you get from a free coaching call with us.

As Teddy Roosevelt said:

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Lotta love,

Steve & Dan

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Please know you are always in control of your subscription to this newsletter and the use of your email address. You signed yourself up and you can “unsign” yourself anytime you please by clicking the “Unsubscribe” link at the bottom of this email. I will always respect your privacy and personal data. You may email me directly if you ever have any questions or concerns about the use of your personal information.

Steven Horsmon

550 Drake Ranch Rd., Livermore, CO 80536, USA

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