Hey brother,

Every man who has attracted his wife back into his marriage relationship had to start with the BASICS!

The most basic thing you can learn is how to handle your thinking and your RESPONSES to conflict with her.  Defending, complaining and explaining never work...no matter how "right" you are or how good it feels.

Stop arguing about stupid shit and respond to her in a more confident and amused manner.  This ONE BASIC CHANGE can work miracles!

Coach Mark Drezga divers deeper into WHY men mess this up and HOW to start changing tonight.

If you want this skill to become a permanent part of your masculine framework, then I HIGHLY recommend you consider joining Mark and Garrett in the next edition of their highly popular course, The Vital Formula to Masculine Confidence.

Here's Mark.

*****

Are you a guy who:

• Constantly feels the need to defend or justify his point
• Takes every disagreement as a personal attack?
• Always wants NEEDS to have the last word?

Arguing is a sure sign that you rely on things outside of you to regulate your own emotional state.

This is why you spend soo much time trying to control things to get a sense of calm inside you.

You argue when you feel small and stupid: 

"I AM RIGHT, YOU'RE JUST NOT UNDERSTANDING MY POINT OF VIEW".

You defend yourself when you believe there is something that needs protecting: 

"YOU SHOULD RESPECT AND ACCEPT MY DECISION; IF YOU DON'T YOU ARE DISMISSING ME AS A PERSON".

You attack when you experience words as a challenge to your own sense of self and the value that you provide:

"IF YOU DON'T LIKE HOW I HANDLE THE FINANCES THEN YOU DEAL WITH THEM".

Anytime you argue, defend, or attack, you are only affirming your need for validation to the other person.

How To Not Feel Threatened By Other People's Opinions

You can act from a dominating position without putting others down or needing their validation. 

Genuine power is about remaining in control of yourself despite what you may be feeling.

It is about dominance over YOURSELF.
 

An insecure man feels the need to manipulate others into agreeing because he doesn't like how the situation makes him feel.
 

When you are living as a secure man, you can sit with those uncomfortable feelings because you know that:
a) They won't kill you as they are just feelings
b) They don't mean anything about you personally
 

You don't always need to DO something about the feelings you are having.
 

You can rely on your values to determine your behaviour despite what your feelings are telling you to do.

Does this stop arguments?
 

Well, it helps with the first step of not starting them!

The next step is making the choice to NOT involve yourself in arguments either.

Understanding "The Drama Triangle"

The 3 roles that create drama in relationships are rescuer, persecutor, and victim. 

Garrett and I spend a great deal of time discussing these 3 roles in The Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course.

There are many factors that contribute to which role you tend to adopt during conflict including which one your partner is playing at the time.
 

However, NONE of the roles is helpful or leads to better connection.
 

The term "role" is a perfect description. 

They are just "performances" by scared, insecure and angry people.

While you may be having scared, insecure and angry THOUGHTS, it is not who you really are or who you want to be.

You get to decide who you want to be. 

And this means you have both the CHOICE AND RESPONSIBILITY to think differently about what is happening...and then act differently.
 

Awareness and a willingness to DO things differently will lead you to different and new results in your relationship.
 

As you begin to see the part YOU play in arguments, you can make a conscious decision to NOT be a part of them.
 

You can decide to STEP OUT OF THE TRIANGLE.
 

You can decide to NOT argue!

How The Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course Will Change Your Marriage

The benefit of joining this group of like-minded men is that you are instantly held accountable and challenged to show up differently.

Here are 4 things you'll learn inside the course:

1. Emotional Awareness

Start noticing what happens inside you, both in the moments BEFORE and DURING any argument. 

Each man is different but there are common signs that you are about to lose control and become reactive.
 

Awareness of these warning signs will help you to avoid arguments by calling time before things get out of control.

The skill of self-control only comes once the practice of self-observation becomes habitual.
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2. Solid Standards

Here is your first standard to be rock solid on: refuse to argue.
 

Simple, but not easy! 

Sometimes the people we have been habitually arguing with may not like that we refuse to play into their games and will do whatever they can to drag us back into their drama.
 

We won’t let you give in!

3. Positive High-Regard

It's time to start assuming the best about your wife.
 

Everything we think about other people are ASSUMPTIONS.

For most people their assumptions are negatively biased, so let's flip things around and make the choice to assume the best of her!
 

The group is excellent at calling out your BS and showing you different perspectives.

4. No More Playing The Victim

Everything is not about you (that’s what the VICTIM thinks).
 

We won’t let you get stuck in a cycle of negative self-talk and shitty behaviours. 

We know what it’s like to be in your shoes, and we can show the path through it.
 

Many men have seen their marriages do a full 180 when they addressed these 4 key areas. 

Are you ready to gain this and more?

We're looking for 8 men who are serious about making huge strides in their masculine development.

• October 11th
• October 25th
• November 8th
• November 27th