How To Make Your Wife See You As Her Lover Again

Published: Mon, 02/17/25

Updated: Mon, 02/17/25

Hey brother,

Here's the most common answer to question #1 on my application for our free introductory coaching consultations calls.

The question is:

In the next 6 months, what changes do you MOST want to see in your life and relationship?

After reading over 5000 answers we can pretty much predict the first few sentences.

"I want to have my wife desire me again. I want her to trust me again. I want to have the easy intimacy and affection we used to have. I want to stop worrying about her commitment and walking on eggshells and get back the confidence I used to feel before all this started. Right now we're no more than roommates."

You may say, "Damn, it's like he's living in my house!"

The good news is that if you're thinking those things you're not alone. Not only that...you're in very good company with hundreds of smart, high quality men just like you.

Let me explain how these guys start making the changes they most want to see in their life and marriage.

It all starts with getting clarity on who they really want to be.

Getting out of the friend zone with your wife will require you to find another zone for yourself.

When you first met her you were in an OTHER zone. You were something new, mysterious, independently confident, self-respecting, self-motivated and unpredictable.

You were something OTHER.

And that's what most of us lose track of once we're in a relationship.

We adopt a familiar rhythm of domestic duties, care taking and money making obligations until we lose all the sexual tension and polarity we started with.

In other words, we allow our role as a husband, father and consummate employee or business owner to numb our very sense of what it means to be our own man on a mission.

The men who succeed in making the changes they want discover it's totally possible to create a continuing sense of "otherness" in their relationship. But they must pay close attention to all the ways they might be sabotaging themselves.

I explain this more in this video.

How To Make Your Wife See You As Her Lover Again

Here's why this may sound ridiculous to you.

By the time we get settled into our familiar routines, repetitious conversations and predictable relationship habits we start believing this is just how it is for everyone.

No. It's not. It doesn't need to be.

This may sound ridiculous because it feels totally counter-intuitive that becoming less predictable, more self-focused, less attached and more mysterious could help you create the changes you want.

It's this twisted truth that successful men seem to understand.

And in their own unique ways they begin making small changes...one day at a time...finding a new "lane" for themselves.

And in the process of doing this they become something OTHER than they've been in years.

And it's this process that gives him the hope, strength and motivation to invite his wife into a whole new level of relationship.

Something OTHER than what they had. Something much better.

I would have NEVER been able to learn this process without the help of other men who traveled before me.

The single biggest reason men fail in the process of change is because they isolate themselves and try to do it alone.

It just doesn't work that way. You need men. Good men. Smart men.

Here are some ways you can connect with these men and get started today...not tomorrow.

$149 One-Time Payment: The Goodguy2Greatmen 3-Step Emergency Triage for You AND Your Marriage - if you need an instant change in your confidence Steve and I created our most powerful short course covering the core foundational and fundamental concepts you'll find hidden within every single self-help book, course or program you'll ever buy.

Free: If you're serious about building your masculine mojo then apply for a coaching call with us we will help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you feeling confident again.

What do I mean by "SERIOUS"?

We take YOU and your struggles seriously...because we've been there
We know feeling like a roommate and not a lover is serious
And we know a lack of clarity about how to change it is serious now and for your long term future happiness
We believe your personal emotional strength and well-being is serious
We seriously show up 110% to our conversations with you and expect you to be as serious as we are about changing your life

Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity

$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men's Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. Get instant access to 6 years of recorded sessions. Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?

$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you've just heard, "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I want to separate or divorce."

As Teddy Roosevelt said:

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Lotta love,

Steve & Dan

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Steven Horsmon

550 Drake Ranch Rd., Livermore, CO 80536, USA

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