How to Handle Your "Bossy Pants" Wife

Published: Wed, 02/14/24

Hey brother,

Yeah, I know. It's not nice to call people names.

But here's the deal. Husbands and wives have been doing this for centuries.

We find a trait that annoys the hell out of us and then we pick a name for it.

Bossy pants
Jerk face
Helicopter mom
Control freak
Needy little boy
Pigpen
3 pump chump (and the list goes on)

The BOSSY PANTS wife is a really, really common phenomena. And most guys absolutely crumble at her feet.

Sometimes, she's a real boss like a surgeon, prosecutor, pilot, teacher, successful entrepreneur. She might be a CEO, COO, CTO, CPA or eieio.

Sometimes, she simply learned how to take charge from her mother.

It's in her DNA. She plans EVERYTHING. She makes ALL the decisions. She's large and in charge and everyone knows it.

And, she's pretty damn good at it. And, although she pretends to like it this way, she actually doesn't.

She's a well oiled machine who hates making mistakes, hates unpleasant surprises, hates disorganization, hates people who don't plan and hates it if anyone sees her sweat.

This is what men with "Bossy Pants" wives complain about to me:

She thinks and speaks faster than I can and I'm totally out gunned
I feel like a deer in the headlights and don't know what to say to please her
Her to-do list is never done and she blames me for everything she puts on the list
She is in total control of our sex life. I have no cards to play.
I can never do anything to her satisfaction - she's never happy
Even her dad told me at the wedding that I'm going to need brass balls to deal with her! (we hear that lot)

So how to you handle this?!

By now you know where I'm going with this, don't you?

You can't and shouldn't try to change her.

But, you must do two things you haven't done yet.

ONE

Truly understand her and the underlying fears, triggers and motivations driving her brain. Learn to SEE HER not as a formidable enemy, but as a struggling mom-daughter-wife-professional who is doing the best she can. (that's called empathy)

TWO

Get your balls back. Learn how to meet her strong energy with a STRONGER ENERGY of calm, confident self-respect. Learn how to stop treating her like your boss. Learn to dance with her and her anxieties in a way that she finds relaxing and fun instead of an invitation to fight.

I know this sounds like a lot. But it's not. And when you spend the time to really learn this, your relationship will quickly and permanently change for the better. Promise.

Some of the GG2GM certified coaches did this video with Dan and I yesterday just for you. I want you to watch it and listen for just ONE THING you can do differently tonight.

Meet coaches Garrett Prettyman (Idaho) , Jeff Allen (Colorado) and Mark Drezga (Melbourne, AUS)

This was a blast. Listen for an INSIGHT that changes the very way you've been thinking.

The Signs This is Working for You

Here's what men tell us when they are mastering this new way of thinking and being.

She has, for lack of a better word, just SOFTENED toward me. I think she trusts me now.
We don't actually "fight" anymore, but we work through her stress together. And she says I calm her down when I'm calm with her.
The kids are less stressed!
She STILL constantly gravitates toward taking charge...and she sees now that I'm not threatened or uncomfortable with it.
She's begun to trust me enough to tell me what's really going on in her brain....sometimes too much!

We LOVE seeing results like this. And we LOVE seeing the "light bulbs" come on in your head for the first time.

Are you ready to get more serious yet? Here are some options:

Free: Fill out our contact form for your "Tame the Bossy Pants" consultation call - it's a free, no strings, 90 minute deep dive personalized coaching session to help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you moving toward the future you want.

Free: Take Our Masculinity Mastery Self Assessment Here

$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men's Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. It's a $69 investment. You get INSTANT access to 5 years of recorded sessions! Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?

We have 4 days left in our Valentine's 50% off deal for the How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb course.

It's the best investment ($248) you could make if you feel like things are moving quickly in the wrong direction. If you've just heard, "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I want to separate or divorce."...this course is for you.

As Teddy Roosevelt said:

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Lotta love,

Steve & Dan

************

Please know you are always in control of your subscription to this newsletter and the use of your email address. You signed yourself up and you can “unsign” yourself anytime you please by clicking the “Unsubscribe” link at the bottom of this email. I will always respect your privacy and personal data. You may email me directly if you ever have any questions or concerns about the use of your personal information.

Steven Horsmon

550 Drake Ranch Rd., Livermore, CO 80536, USA

Unsubscribe | Change Subscriber Options