Are You Questioning Whether To Stay Married?

Published: Thu, 12/28/23

Hey brother,

In the beginning of marriage "Phase I" with your wife I bet there was an underlying comfort and certainty that she thought pretty highly of you.

She was probably openly affectionate, admiring and easily receptive to your advances.

There's a belief at this point that it will ALWAYS be like this.

Warm, Close. Spontaneous. Safe

THEN POOF!

You're into "Phase II" before you know it and barely even noticed that her admiration and respect has been replaced by a dutiful energy of expectation and routine.

You're into the eat, sleep, mow lawn, pay bills, feed kids, go to work and keep the nose to the grindstone phase. It's a phase everyone hits. It's not bad. It can be fulfilling and fun. But it ain't Phase I. And you're already wondering if this is all you've signed up for.

THEN POOF!

You wake up one morning to an air of distance, dismissiveness, disrespect and a splash of low grade resentment. It's in both of you. And you didn't see it coming. But now you're concerned. This can't be good.

Welcome to "Phase III" of your marriage. This is where about half the couples begin their slow decline toward divorce. It's also where some couples begin a new decade of indifference, disconnection and sadness about their relationship.

Some stay in this phase for the rest of their life.

And some battle their way through it with sense of determination, purpose and intentionality.

These couples are rare. Would you like to learn how to do that?

First watch my short video on what it's going to take to see if you have it in you.

Are You Questioning Whether To Stay Married?

The big secret to getting out of Phase III in your marriage is to realize that everything you've learned to this point is exactly what will keep you stuck here.

As I taught you in the video above, I want you to try something NEW for a change.

Give it 7 days and hold yourself accountable to consistency!

Don't overreact or raise your voice no matter what. Don't take things so personally

Listen more and talk less

Stop trying to "be right" about stuff and refuse to argue about stupid things

Take care of yourself by exercising, connecting with friends and finding something...ANYTHING...to laugh about

Stop looking to your wife for signs of approval or admiration

Admire yourself and approve of who you are and how you're being.

I really want to know how it went for you. Seriously! In 7 days I'll look for an email from you to let me know how you're doing.

And more than I care about her reaction to you, I want to know how YOU felt about YOU while you were doing it.

If you can start feeling better about YOU and how you're showing up in your relationship you will have taken the first big step in the journey to getting to Phase IV.

Do you want to learn more about how to get to Phase IV?

Do you want more respect, admiration and intimacy?

If so, I want you to sign up for a "free, no strings, personalised coaching session" with me, Dan or one of our certified coaches.

It's a real conversation. You get to talk and be heard, seen and understood like never before.

You won't be constantly interrupted while you're explaining how you feel. Some guys say this one call is more valuable than 12 marriage counseling sessions.

These coaching calls are intensely focused on YOU and YOUR THINKING.

There are not for everyone. But they are perfect for the man willing to try something different...something strangely counter-intuitive.

If you're ready for a powerful and intensely personal conversation about where you want to go, we're ready. Get a comfy chair and a cup of coffee. This conversation is NOT a "taster session".

Fill out our contact form for a free, no strings, personalized coaching session to help you slow down and refocus on what is really important right now.

Or try one of our other options to get the support you need at this time:

Free: Take Our Attractive Husband Self Assessment Here

$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men's Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. It's a $69 investment. You get INSTANT access to 5 years of recorded sessions! Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?

$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you've just heard, "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I want to separate or divorce."

As Teddy Roosevelt said:

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Lotta love,

Steve & Dan

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Steven Horsmon

550 Drake Ranch Rd., Livermore, CO 80536, USA

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