The Cousin To Narcissism Nobody Is Talking About

Published: Thu, 12/28/23

Hey,

One of the top 10 most annoying and over-used words of 2023 is:

NARCISSISM

Everyone likes to sound like a psychiatrist then they're throwing out nasty insults as if it gives their insult a bit more credibility.

It's important you don't do this. It's important you know the difference between real narcissism and generalized insecurity.

Why?

So you can be a much more mature, confident and effective man who doesn't toss around $20 words for the fun of it.

Coach Garrett Prettyman goes deeper in this email about narcissism. I highly recommend you read it with care and then think about joining him and coach Mark Drezga in their next round of the very popular Vital Formula to Masculine Confidence course coming up in January. This course gets great reviews by past students!

Here's coach Garrett to tell you more.

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Our "Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course" provides the framework you need to deal with a narcissistic woman.

Register your spot, I promise you won't regret it!

If you have 5 minutes to spare, keep reading to learn how to spot narcissism and its close cousin, echoism.

What Is Narcissism?

Narcissism is just a label, there's always something driving it.

Labels prompt us to think inside a box and in this case, a judgmental box.

Let's put our preconceived notions on the shelf for a few minutes.

Narcissism can be a self-protection mechanism for root causes like insecurity.

Narcissism being driven by a mental disorder like a sociopathic brain will most likely never change since the CAUSE is permanent.

For most people though, the cause is insecurity which CAN be resolved if the person chooses to address their insecurity.

The narcissist can emerge OVERTLY (think of a bully) or COVERTLY (think passive-aggressive).

Watch the video below for a new perspective on narcissism!

The Difference Between Narcissism And Confidence

A confident person operates from a place of security and will live up to their values regardless of how others feel about it.
A narcissist operates from a place of insecurity and feels a false sense of superiority by putting others down.

A confident person prioritizes their own needs but also empathizes with the needs of others.
A narcissist prioritizes their own needs and has no care for the needs of others.

The confident person intends to grow self-abundance so everyone can benefit.
The narcissist intends to grow self-abundance so only they can benefit.

Is Narcissism Different In Women Than Men?

The short answer is yes.

According to the Cleveland Clinic, narcissism affects between .5-5% of Americans with 50-75% being men.

What I'm about to share was by no means formed through clinical research.

In my experience, there's text book answers in life, and there's the experience of people in the field.

I prefer to listen to the old farmer's hack for extracting a snapped-off head-bolt over a graduate from a school of engineering.

For me, I value the years of hands-on experience of the old farmer vs someone who has only conceptualized how machines work.

Based on my own experience with women, and the many men in various cultures I've worked with, it's emerged that MOST women ARE narcissists when it comes to sexual intimacy.

Before you freak out, hear me out.

The word "narcissist" paints a negative image in our minds.

Notice how my statement below feels when I change the wording.

A woman is SUPPOSED to not use OUR feelings of affection or passion as the on/off switch to her care for us because she isn't wired to.

I think all of us men can agree the status of our raging boner has little effect on whether or not our wife will tune into our passionate feelings.

The doors to sexual intimacy orbit around HER feelings, HER moods, and whether or not HER heart feels valued- it's all about her!

Men feel raging affection for women all the time and his feelings have little effect on whether she shows care for his feelings or not.

At the end of the day, remaining in integrity with HER feelings vs HIS feelings is how the erotic side of women functions.

Isn't Narcissism Bad?

We typically view a narcissist as a MEAN person.

A narcissist thinks the world revolves around them and they don't give two hoots about what others are feeling.

But, think about it.

A confident, secure person doesn't give two hoots about what others think or feel about him either.

Are we really being "mean" by having our own emotional frame and choosing self-reliance?

Think of narcissism as a pendulum for insecurity. There's healthy points on the scale and extremes.

The echoist is the polar opposite of a narcissist.

An echoist is driven by the same fear as the narcissists but tries to manage their insecurity by bending over backward to "mommy" everyone else's needs.

Going back to the data from the Cleveland Clinic, The odds are only 1 in 200 people we meet are narcissists.

That's a very low number!!

The question staring us in the face is this:

Most people ARE capable of caring about others, so what kind of person would try to be in a relationship with a narcissist in the first place?

Narcissists attract their opposite, the echoist.

Someone who has no emotional frame, no boundaries, fawns others, is easily manipulated, or self-devaluing will cling to a narcissist.

The narcissist desperately needs to be fawned by the echoist to feel worthy and the echoist desperately needs someone to care for to feel worthy.

Both are desperately trying to find value through others.

You see, the polar opposite of a self-grandiose person is a person who is grandiose in humility, self-sacrifice, and abandonment of self-interest.

The chronically self-sacrificing person needs to learn some traits from the narcissist to balance their own scale.

Extreme ANYTHING can be seen as "bad”.

How To Deal With a Woman's Bedroom Narcissistic Tendencies

We've already established that females are mostly INCAPABLE of tuning into our love-making passions unless everything orbits around HER emotional needs being met.

This feels very disempowering for women.

Imagine how you would feel if part of your nature was dependent on whether someone else had provided you with something or not.

We can't change how she's wired, but we can unravel this a bit deeper.

Under narcissism is insecurity, fear, and lack of power.

When she meets OUR security, OUR power, and OUR fearless living, she's faced with a choice.

Either she'll choose to relax into our strength and let her emotional walls down revealing her raw vulnerability or she'll blame us for her pain and leave our life.

A woman chronically stuck in narcissism is not compatible with a strong, confident person.

You can take the lead.

You can learn how to build a framework of emotional safety and security that makes it easy for her to choose a healthy, intimate connection with you.

Our "Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course" will develop the frame you need to address your fears and insecurities.

Click HERE to pay and save your spot!

A confident man keeps his focus on what's in HIS control and notices his OWN tendencies of insecurity and fear.

Resolving our own stuff is always the right path forward!

Stay grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman

Associate coach at GG2GM

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