Why Women Always Say, "You HEAR me but you don't LISTEN!"

Published: Sun, 09/17/23

(If you're in Gmail this email may be messed up at the bottom - just click the "View entire message" link at the bottom to read the whole thing).

Hey brother,

Have you ever heard, "You HEAR me...it's just that you don't LISTEN"?

Of course, you have. You're a dude. If you're not a dude, then you've probably said it.

The way most dudes listen is with one ear. Our intention is to pick up all the necessary facts and we can usually parrot back some details of what we heard. (don't ask me how I know this)

The OTHER ear is paying attention to something else.

We're either reading an email, listening to the TV, or thinking about a thought that just popped into our head. We THINK we are multi-tasking but we're really just task-switching between being present with HER and being present...uh...something else.

Let's be honest, brother. If you're talking to a guy and he doing that sh*t to you, it kind of pisses you off.

Well, when we (when I) do this with my sweetheart, it doesn't piss her off her so much. It does something worse.

She gets the FEELING that I don't care...I don't see her...I don't value her...and I don't respect her.

Now, that's not true (as far as I know)...and I will defend how much I care all day long.

But one thing is unforgiveable in her mind.

And that is feeling dismissed as an annoyance. It's the feeling that, regardless of my INTENTIONS, my ATTENTION is somewhere else.

And that's a crappy feeling. And nothing much good happens after that. Hmmmm.....

So, I bought a new TOOL!

Watch the video to hear all about it. It was inspired by a song by the late Jimmy Buffet...he will be greatly missed.

Why Women Always Say, "You HEAR me but you don't LISTEN!"

One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.

Bryant H. McGill

I know I like it when someone sincerely listen to me. So, why is it so hard for me to return the favor?

I'm much better than I used to be...but I can do better. Most of us can.

It's the biggest gift you can give. And if you want to be a bit more generous without spending a dime, try this out.

This weekend, try to JUST LISTEN to every one you meet. When it gets quiet, ask them a follow-up question. And when it gets quiet again, ask them, "And what else?".

You will blow their mind...and their heart in a really good way.

Practicing with kids is an easy way to start. Then gradually make it riskier by doing it with your wife or girlfriend.

It's hard to shut up, but it's a valuable gift every man can learn! Let me know how it goes for you. I'll always reply back to you personally.

*****

And if you’re ready for a deep, caring conversation about getting back on the right path with some additional support from a coach, apply for a free "I Want To Feel Consistently Happy & Confident In Myself" consultation call - these consultations are actually mini-coaching sessions and you will hang up feeling like "what the hell just happened?"...in a really good way.

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How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you've just heard, "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I want to separate or divorce."

As Teddy Roosevelt said:

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

What have you got to lose?

With love, brother,

Steve

************

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Steven Horsmon

550 Drake Ranch Rd., Livermore, CO 80536, USA

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