OR have you just accepted whatever you thought you could get from your wife and not fully gone after what you really wanted in life?
If you have do any of these things, then know this brother, me too…
I am able to ask you all of these questions because I did them all.
For decades I lived life feeling unworthy and powerless. It sucks, doesn’t it?
Hell yes, it sucks, big time!
Never feeling like you have a say in what happens and being afraid that if you express your true desires your wife will get upset, yell at you, or worse not talk to you at all.
I know how you feel AND I also know what it feels like to finally be able to fully express myself without fear, to finally value my own opinions and ideas, to finally live MY life.
So how did I break free from that painful existence?
Let me tell you a story…
Like you, in 2017 I felt trapped, going through the motions, in a life and a marriage I didn’t enjoy.
Because back then I too let other people make my decisions for me.
I let my wife run my life like I was a little boy, always seeking mommy’s approval.
Ouch! Sounds like a harsh statement, right? Did I poke you in the eye a little? Great!
Because, tell me if this sounds familiar.
I wouldn’t go places and do things unless my wife, my kids, my friends, my extended family, or my co-workers agreed to join me. If they didn’t want to go, then I told myself I couldn’t go and secretly I felt like if they didn’t want to go, then my ideas must not have been good enough.
What I didn’t realize then, but I know for sure now is that I didn’t value my own ideas because I didn’t value myself.
Let that sink in for a minute!
I didn’t value myself, so I wasn’t able to value my own ideas.
In 2017 I wanted to take my family on a Colorado camping trip. Hike some, hot tub some, and watch the sunrises and sunsets some. Most of all I wanted to get away from work, emails and text messages for a few days. But my wife was emotionally distant at the time and she didn’t feel safe to travel with
me.
After a lot of frustration and inner turmoil, I finally decided to go by myself. I wanted to go places, see things, and have experiences and if no one else was going to join me, then I would just go by myself.
As I type these words, that last sentence sounds very decisive, like I had absolute clarity and didn’t care what anyone else thought, but I can tell you that at the time I felt anytime but “decisive”.
What I felt was abandoned, unsupported, and unloved.
I was at the same time, deathly afraid of her disapproval and to some degree, trying to run away from everything that was bothering me.
So, I packed up my camping gear, threw my mountain bike in the family van and drove off to the Rocky Mountains feeling like my marriage was falling apart and feeling professionally burnt out.
On the road I listened to self-help audiobooks, contemplated leaving my wife and family, and talked out loud to God.
I wasn’t just going on a camping trip, I was looking for answers on that open road.
What I didn’t know at the time was that the trip was just the start of my journey to freedom.
Simply doing something on my own, being responsible for my own needs, and making my own decisions about when I ate, when I slept, and what I did with my day, without checking with anyone else first was something I hadn’t allowed myself to experience in 20 years.
While I was away, I got up at o-dark-thirty, literally climbed a water fall, hiked to the farthest point of a mountain trail before needing an ice-axe and snow shoes, and eventually set up my tent in the family camping area of the Rocky Mountain National Park.
Then, after a long day of hiking, I was exhausted physically. So I secured a camp spot in the only available area of the park; the family camping area.
While I laid there alone in my spacious four person tent, I could hear kids playing outside and the sounds of evening dinner being prepared and it broke my heart. Why weren’t my kids running, laughing, and playing outside? Why weren’t my wife and I grilling burgers and looking forward to an evening sunset
walk?
Something was terribly wrong. Something was broken in my life and my relationship. I needed help.
When I returned from that trip I read the book, No More Mr. Nice Guy, which woke me up and set me on the path to looking for someone who could help me better understand how to be the man I wanted to be. I was always afraid of upsetting other people. I was doing everything I thought I was supposed to
do to make other people happy. I thought if I did everything right and didn’t make any mistakes, I could have a problem free life. But, I was miserable because I wasn’t living the life I wanted to live.
That’s when I came across a YouTube video by Steve Horsmon where he said, “I don’t care about your wife. I don’t care about your relationship. I care about you” and I knew that he had something that I wanted.
After that video I binge watched all his videos looking for insights into how to be the man I wanted to be.
I joined the Goodguys2Greatmen Round Table Community and with the help of Dan, Steve, and countless men in the community, I learned to value myself, to be honest
about my needs, to say what it is that I want, and to not let other people’s opinions and desires dictate the terms of my life.
Today I help men all over the world learn to value themselves and so I want to invite you into a conversation where we can talk about what’s frustrating you, what you want to change and what kind of life you want to have.
So, where do you go from here?
If any of my story resonates with you or you would like to talk with someone about valuing yourself, improving your confidence, connecting with your masculine, dealing with separation or divorce, or any other issues you are dealing with as a man, then let’s set up a time to talk.
You don’t have to go through this alone. You are not required to join a men’s group or hire a men’s coach. Just be willing to take the first step by reaching out and starting a conversation with someone who understands, will listen, and who cares about
you.
At this point we always ask you, "What do you want?"
It's one of the hardest questions for men to answer. Why?
It seems as if we've been programmed to be afraid of saying what we want!
Only a total jerk would clearly, plainly and unapologetically say out loud what he really wants for himself and his life...right?
Wrong. In fact, if you don't decide to clearly state what you want and go after it, nobody else will do it for you.
We send you these emails to stimulate your thinking and to stir your emotions. That's the first step to taking the lead in your life.
If this email jolted your thinking...or if it tugged at your heart, then you are being called to stand up and do something.
We want to show you what it’s like to speak with a man who has lived what you’re going through. It’s rare to feel totally seen, heard and valued by another man.
Simple.
We live to serve men. We live to light a spark of realization in your mind that change is possible. Confidence is natural. And becoming empowered to improve your situation is mandatory.
If you want to talk about our coaching programs, groups and courses, that may take another call.
First things first. Let’s get you moving in the right direction for now.
Click HERE now to schedule your personal conversation.
